Tell family you are moving: FYI, or ask for help — not both at once

The lease is signed. Decide whether this message is an announcement or a request for Saturday hands. Mixing them is how nobody books a truck and everyone sends a heart.

3 min read

You signed. You have a date. Your mother will want to know why the neighborhood, your brother will ask about the schools, and your cousin is the one who owns a van. If you put all of that in one note, you will get a heart from your mother and silence from the van.

Pick a shape. Send that shape.

FYI and a help ask are different messages

Choosing a response shape is the whole problem. An FYI says: we are moving on the 19th, here is the address, no reply needed. A help ask says: can you take a Saturday shift, 10 to 2, lifting boxes, and a yes means you will be there.

If you need the van, write the help ask. Do not "mention" the date and hope they offer. People read an announcement as an announcement. They do not scan it for implied labor.

If you only need them to know, write the FYI and mean it. "No need to reply" is a gift. Respect their time by not manufacturing a decision they cannot affect.

A decision shape is for the one person whose answer changes the plan: "Can you take the 19th, 10 to 2, or should I hire the last two hours?" Close the list.

Give a cold reader the date, the place, and the job

Whether FYI or ask, the first screen has:

  • date and time window
  • from / to, in enough detail that a driver can arrive
  • stairs, elevator, parking
  • what you are actually asking, or the sentence that you are not asking

Leave the essay about why you left. They can get that on the phone. The briefing is the logistics. If your assistant drafted a warm paragraph about "this chapter," cut it unless you would say it to their face.

They do not need an account. Email and a link. You approve the send. The session may still have the fight with the landlord. That fight stays.

Do not attach a floor plan. Describe the stairs. If they want photos, they ask.

One recipient whose answer matters

The cousin with the van gets the help ask. The uncle who will only worry gets the FYI. If a relative already uses RelayLink, you need an accepted contact. Everyone else is email.

A sufficient reply to the ask is "yes, 10 to 2" or "no, hire it." A sufficient reply to the FYI is nothing. A reply is how you know they have it. A fetched link is not a read. You will not see whether they put Saturday on a calendar.

When the date is in a session and you can feel yourself writing one note to the whole family, connect your assistant and send two shapes on purpose, instead of one that earns hearts and no van.

Frequently asked questions

What is the difference between FYI and asking for help?
FYI needs no reply. A help ask names a day, a job, and what a yes commits them to. If you need Saturday, do not hide it under an announcement.
Do relatives need a RelayLink account?
No. If they do not have one, they get email and a link. If they already have one, you need an accepted contact first.
Can I send one briefing to the whole family?
Send the FYI to the people who only need to know. Send the help ask to the two people who could actually show up. A single message to twelve people gets hearts and no van.